Week 35: It was th-th-thirty years ago today

Mike Smears standing in front of his brand new 1985 Howitzer tank estate

The old man of the league, Smearsy, notches up another Manager of the Week certificate win by allowing his rabble of youfs, aka Irishpool, to score a week's total of nineteen.  N-n-n-n-n-n-n-nineteen. Nineteen.  N-n-n-n-nineteen.

Paul Hardcastle there.

And while we grapple with a 30 year old Pop Culture reference [the like of which Mike, himself, would still have been too old at the time to currently understand] we quickly move on...

Should you still be in the OFFL Cup, don't forget to get your transfers in for the Semi-Finals to be played in Week 37 - good quizzing times ahead for the winner of the Cup, I must add - the winner will be receiving the Football Fans Quizbook as the most wondrous 1st Prize.

D-d-d-d-d d-d-d-destruction.

MANAGER OF THE MONTH FOR MARCH

Congratulations, Sarah Bingham - 43 points in one month.
                                                Month's
   Manager            Team                       Score
-------------------------------------------------------
 1 Sarah Bingham      Not In Your Mum's Forest    43
 2 Dave Clayton       Pyeators                    39
 3 Mike Smears        Irishpool                   38
 3 Russ Bielby        Livercoolio                 38
 5 Smasher            Inter Milandrover           34
 5 Malcolm Pratt      Malcolmyouplaysobadly       34
 5 Neil McConaghy     Neil's Diamonds             34
 8 Stanley Wilson     Botley Yellow               32
 8 Rachel Jones       Which Team                  32
10 Nick Reed          Couldn't be Hyppia          31
10 Gavin Ward         Blet Satters Mad Hatters    31
10 Ashley Keeler      It's A Snickers             31
13 Jon King           Moobchester United          29
14 Edgar Rayner       Didcot Rovers               28
15 Mandy Noble        The Flying Geese            27
15 Chris Walsh        Obi Wan - Kenobi Nil        27
17 Craig McHugh       Real Mcdrid                 25
18 Rick Beecroft      RS-TBOY                     23
18 Sarah Bielby       Johnny's Heroes             23
18 Alex Blundell      Moanchester Disunited       23
21 Alun Edwards       Radnorshire Tigers          21
22 Minty Colquhoun    A Bit Temperamintal         17
23 Adrian Bradley     Awesome Athletic            12
24 Pete Braithwaite   Pedro's Plodders             2

Oh Pedro.



T h e   T a b l e
                                            Value Points
   Team                       Manager       (GBPm)Wk Tot
 --------------------------------------------------------
 1 Livercoolio               Russ Bielby      54.9 18 339
 2 Malcolmyouplaysobadly     Malcolm Pratt    54.4  5 327
 3 Irishpool                 Mike Smears      53.8 19 312
 4 Johnny's Heroes           Sarah Bielby     54.8 14 310
 5 RS-TBOY                   Rick Beecroft    54.3  8 307
 6 Inter Milandrover         Smasher          53.8  9 304
 7 Not In Your Mum's Forest  Sarah Bingham    54.7  9 299
 8 Blet Satters Mad Hatters  Gavin Ward       54.6 13 294
 9 Botley Yellow             Stanley Wilson   52.8  9 291
10 The Flying Geese          Mandy Noble      54.1  3 270

11 Which Team                Rachel Jones     55.0  0 265
12 Pyeators                  Dave Clayton     54.9  9 263
13 Radnorshire Tigers        Alun Edwards     49.3  6 251
14 Moobchester United        Jon King         52.1  6 242
15 Couldn't be Hyppia        Nick Reed        54.6  5 236
16 Obi Wan - Kenobi Nil      Chris Walsh      54.6  7 228
17 Moanchester Disunited     Alex Blundell    52.1 14 225
18 Didcot Rovers             Edgar Rayner     54.8  7 221
19 It's A Snickers           Ashley Keeler    54.6 10 211
20 A Bit Temperamintal       Minty Colquhoun  53.4  5 203
21 Neil's Diamonds           Neil McConaghy   54.8  2 203
22 Real Mcdrid               Craig McHugh     54.8  2 187
23 Awesome Athletic          Adrian Bradley   50.2  2 125
24 Pedro's Plodders          Pete Braithwaite 46.7  0  97


                             Week's Average Points      7
                             Total Average Points     250
---

Week 30: Flagging Morale

A young Mike Smears before his morale started flagging

Manager of the Week this week is Mr Mike Smears of Irishpool loveliness.  21 points saw off the challenges from whipper-snappers Russ Bielby and Sarah Bingbong and saw the old man snaffle a much needed certificate to bolster flagging morale.

And no matter how much we, here at Studmarks, would love to experience our own morale boost to help needlessly stretch out this nonsense it just so happens to be one of those editions where we're just not going to be able to pull it off [again] with enough haste nor wit to make it worth your while.  

And besides some of you have the OFFL Cup to worry about.

Boom.

OFFL Cup

ROUND THREE

To be played in Week 32

Irishpool                    v   Malcolmyouplaysobadly
Mike Smears                              Malcolm Pratt

Johnny's Heroes              v      Moobchester United
Sarah Bielby                                  Jon King

Blet Satters Mad Hatters     v      Radnorshire Tigers
Gavin Ward                                Alun Edwards

Not In Your Mum's Forest     v        The Flying Geese
Sarah Bingham                              Mandy Noble

An out of date second hand Football Quiz Book is up for grabs.

T h e   T a b l e
                                            Value Points
   Team                       Manager       (GBPm)Wk Tot
 --------------------------------------------------------
 1 Livercoolio               Russ Bielby      54.9 17 294
 2 Malcolmyouplaysobadly     Malcolm Pratt    54.4  8 283
 3 RS-TBOY                   Rick Beecroft    54.3 11 278
 4 Johnny's Heroes           Sarah Bielby     54.8 15 271
 5 Irishpool                 Mike Smears      53.7 21 267
 6 Inter Milandrover         Smasher          53.8  9 266
 7 Blet Satters Mad Hatters  Gavin Ward       54.6 15 255
 8 Not In Your Mum's Forest  Sarah Bingham    54.7 16 252
 9 Botley Yellow             Stanley Wilson   52.6 14 250
10 The Flying Geese          Mandy Noble      54.1 10 238

11 Radnorshire Tigers        Alun Edwards     49.7  7 223
12 Which Team                Rachel Jones     55.0 -1 221
13 Pyeators                  Dave Clayton     54.3 14 220
14 Moobchester United        Jon King         52.1 12 214
15 Couldn't be Hyppia        Nick Reed        54.6  4 197
16 Obi Wan - Kenobi Nil      Chris Walsh      54.6 11 189
17 A Bit Temperamintal       Minty Colquhoun  55.0  9 185
18 Didcot Rovers             Edgar Rayner     54.8 10 183
19 Moanchester Disunited     Alex Blundell    52.1  5 182
20 It's A Snickers           Ashley Keeler    54.6 12 173
21 Neil's Diamonds           Neil McConaghy   54.8 15 170
22 Real Mcdrid               Craig McHugh     54.8  7 154
23 Awesome Athletic          Adrian Bradley   50.2  6 110
24 Pedro's Plodders          Pete Braithwaite 46.7  3  96


                             Week's Average Points     10
                             Total Average Points     215
---

Week 20: Zartog Strikes Back

Manager of the Week is NOT Sarah Bielby.  That is a fact.  Read it.  Take it on board people.  It's like a new dawn or something.  A New Christmas Dawn.

No it's not.  She may not have nabbed the certificate but her Johnny's Heroes have snaffled Second place to her husband's First.  This season is turning into a Bielby rout.

Happily, though probably initiating another cantankerous rant, the Manager of the Week certificate has actually gone to Mike Smears.  His Irishpool score a massive 38 points pushing themselves into the lofty position of Fourth.

Oh Lofty, Michelle NEVER loved you.

OFFL Cup

Group Stages, So Far

Group A                        Value  Wk20
------------------------------------------
  Inter Milandrover             54.2    35
  Livercoolio                   55.0    28
  It's A Snickers               54.6    19

Group B                        Value  Wk20
------------------------------------------
  Blet Satters Mad Hatters      54.6    25
  Malcolmyouplaysobadly         54.8    19
  Real Mcdrid                   54.8    15

Group C                        Value  Wk20
------------------------------------------
  Irishpool                     54.8    38
  A Bit Temperamintal           55.0    29
  RS-TBOY                       52.2    19

Group D                        Value  Wk20
------------------------------------------
  Pyeators                      55.0    23
  Obi Wan - Kenobi Nil          50.0    21
  Which Team                    55.0    21

Group E                        Value  Wk20
------------------------------------------
  Johnny's Heroes               54.0    33
  Moanchester Disunited         52.1    26
  Didcot Rovers                 55.0    10

Group F                        Value  Wk20
------------------------------------------
  The Flying Geese              54.2    30
  Neil's Diamonds               54.1    24
  Not In Your Mum's Forest      54.7    18

Group G                        Value  Wk20
------------------------------------------
  Botley Yellow                 51.7    24
  Couldn't be Hyppia            54.6    24
  Awesome Athletic              50.2    13

Group H                        Value  Wk20
------------------------------------------
  Radnorshire Tigers            49.7    25
  Moobchester United            51.7    23
  Pedro's Plodders              46.7     9

One more week of this left and we'll know who's in and who's out.

Pedro's probably out, let's face it.

Well that's it for 2014, now you can go back to watching Mary Poppins.  Or a repeat of the Big Bang Theory.

Or Space Chimps 2: Zartog Strikes Back.

Have a safe New Year.

T h e   T a b l e
                                            Value Points
   Team                       Manager       (GBPm)Wk Tot
 --------------------------------------------------------
 1 Livercoolio               Russ Bielby      55.0 28 201
 2 Johnny's Heroes           Sarah Bielby     54.0 33 196
 3 Malcolmyouplaysobadly     Malcolm Pratt    54.8 19 194
 4 Irishpool                 Mike Smears      54.8 38 185
 5 Which Team                Rachel Jones     55.0 21 183
 6 RS-TBOY                   Rick Beecroft    52.2 19 176
 7 Radnorshire Tigers        Alun Edwards     49.7 25 174
 8 Inter Milandrover         Smasher          54.3 35 173
 9 Not In Your Mum's Forest  Sarah Bingham    54.7 18 167
10 Blet Satters Mad Hatters  Gavin Ward       54.6 25 164

11 Botley Yellow             Stanley Wilson   51.7 24 162
12 Moanchester Disunited     Alex Blundell    52.1 26 154
13 The Flying Geese          Mandy Noble      54.2 30 154
14 Pyeators                  Dave Clayton     55.0 23 152
15 It's A Snickers           Ashley Keeler    54.6 19 144
16 A Bit Temperamintal       Minty Colquhoun  55.0 29 138
17 Couldn't be Hyppia        Nick Reed        54.6 24 136
18 Obi Wan - Kenobi Nil      Chris Walsh      50.0 21 124
19 Moobchester United        Jon King         51.7 23 124
20 Didcot Rovers             Edgar Rayner     55.0 10 121
21 Real Mcdrid               Craig McHugh     54.8 15 120
22 Neil's Diamonds           Neil McConaghy   54.1 24 112
23 Awesome Athletic          Adrian Bradley   50.2 13  81
24 Pedro's Plodders          Pete Braithwaite 46.7  9  60


                             Week's Average Points     22
                             Total Average Points     149
---

Angelina Jolie does not feature in this post.  Neither does Emma Watson.  Nor does Rihanna, Zoella, Tanya Burr, Robin Williams, men in nappies, mature women nor any other high ranking search engine terms.